There are so many things I want to know:
Deep mysteries surrounding my lost past.
I’d like to share my story with you all –
If only I had asked my questions then!
But those whom I would ask are dead and gone,
How shall I ever know now who I am?
There are stories – some of them bizarre,
But there are none to say, “We really know.”
The photographs lost in the war are gone,
I cannot reach into my family past.
There’s not one clue to take me back to then,
Romance or grief, there’s nothing left at all!
To answer all my questions, and recall
Those mysteries which we heard about Papa:
Of all the family members who lived then,
I’d ask some now to tell me what they know;
And from the darkest gloom of times long past
Show me my tree of life from years now gone.
But the secrets locked in their hearts are gone.
And distant forebears whom I would recall;
Whose stories have been lost as years have passed;
Should they return would say, “Though here we are,
We cannot tell those things we did not know,
Nor can you understand who we were then.”
“Our reasons, the emotions we felt then
Were vitally important, but they’re gone.
And only God can ever say he knows
The maelstrom at the centre of us all.
Our deepest motives made us what we are,
They were the beating heart of our lost past.”
I’ll search in all the records of that past:
Their births and deaths and weddings, and if then
Perhaps I find those forebears from afar,
(Although their voices are now hushed and gone),
Maybe I’ll lift a corner of the pall,
And learn the truths I wanted so to know!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Out of the darkness then new light may fall. . .
God’s love is never gone, though loved ones are.
He safely holds and knows our long lost past!
[ A Sestina inspired by the television series. A Sestina is a closed, non-rhyming verse form of six sixains, each stanza using the end words – or their variants- of the previous one according to this pattern,
123456 615243 615243 615243 615243 615243. Lastly a three line envoi uses two of the words in each line according to this pattern – 2-5 4-3 6-1 . It’s hard, and not my favourite form, but was worth trying this once.]